How really good is to play just for sport interest. Is it my nervous system malfunctionning or some champs troubles, but almost all the important tourneys where the victory gave only material values, I lost. And in other games where I played just to shoot and defeat everyone, all was going much better... A small list that came to my memory:

August 1999, St-Petersburg, Novak club: Quake 2 duel tourney, giving the title of the Russia's strongest duel player and a cup. The best players were participating, besides Aha (Moscow), and the taste of victory came only after the final...

May 2000, St-Petersburg, LenExpo. Quake 3 duels in the frame of PACC 5. The main PACC's cup was taken by PELE, and I had nothing to lose. In addition to that as the 1st place prize was given a possibility of going to a tourney in Europe (previous Razer CPL USA qualifiers weren't considered as a chance to go abroad as the American visa isn't easy to get). And showing something to Europe was very strong. The qualifier was passed by me, a barrier taken...

August 2000, London, Europe 4x4 teamplay champ. We believed in the fact that we were going there only about 1,5 weeks before the tourney, and started training like crazy. We couldn't believe untill the last moment that we'd be able to play "live" with the real European Quake celebrities. I practiced in duels during my free time, especially to play with Blue from clan 9 =). Nobody could even think about 10 000 Euros for the 1st place. We thought only about how to get out the group. When we defeated the Germans, we just lied in our hotel and thought if it's worth to play the final in general. And then we decided that it can't get worse, and played... You know the result.

December 2000, Cologne, CPL Europe. The first european tourney for Russian players. The first possibility to meet famous Fatal1ty and the others. There were no thoughts at all in my head, but to play with HIM. I did it... can't say it was a success, but at least it was. There also was some kind of pride, that I lost just 1 frag to Fat. In the losers my goal was to play with him again, as I was kinda unlucky for the first time. I didn't care who Lakerman was, just to get to the revenge with Fat, which failed, in fact. I learned later that I won 4 000 Euros. It was good, though I spent it very quickly.

January 2001, Amsterdam, Eurocup 2. We were invited... We were given a chance after our stunning defeat at LAN Arena 5 to show what we're capable of. We had serious trainings, especially on aiming. In the game vs Allstars we were shouting like crazy the fathers' phrase: "Suck the d|&k, motherf$%^ers!". We were strong enough. In the final a misunderstanding happened between the coach NoiSe and the rest of the team, it was unclear where to run and how to give in (the most effective way is to give in by packs =)), and the defeat in the game... But we did a good work in general...

April 2001, Maidenhead, XS AMD CUP. I was invited there. Regarding the fact I took 5th place in Russia at the last tourney. It means organizers remember and believe in me. They took all the charges for the trip, and I couldn't not to justify myself. In plus, the tourney was intended as a fathers' gathering. There was a chance to defeat Fatal1ty. I think he didn't approach the game seriously from the start, and then it was too late. In the end Europe's honor was protected. Though it sounds too pop =).

July 2001, Moscow, Astalavista-5. A tourney of four duellers while CPL London qualifier in Moscow. First I was persuading  bull3t and d1monn not to apply me for the tourney. Then, when I understood that taking part was imminent, I started to ask them to replace q3dm13 from event. As it turned out, the organizer was another person, and I failed to change anything. OK, anyway, there was nothing to lose, small prizes, and I had to play anyway. I couldn't defeat LeXeR, as I underestimated him a lot. After leading with 6 frags on t4 in 1,5 mins I relaxed a lot and the defeat was my result. And then t2, where my anger from the first game made me totally lost. I couldn't underestimate PELE and Death, and defeated both...

October 2001, Moscow, WCG Russia PR - 4x4 teamplay. Feeling more and more involved in teamplay, I realized that I couldn't take a serious approach to duels. The prize was too important a trip to Korea for WCG. I managed somehow to defeat PELE, but then I broke. The game with Demon was really funny =). But we did made it in the teamplay. In fact, the flooders from T33.ns didn't give us a chance to play with ForZe, but it was good anyway. Nice to see that there was another guy from c58-2 who didn't think about money during the champ.

Right before our trip to Korea... LeXeR came to Moscow to do some practice, and I was sure he didn't consider me as a serious player (not to offend LeX, it just seemed to me like that). As a result this pressure made me lose quickly two games (NERVES), and then I had nothing to lose. And I defeated LeXeR three times straight. We recorded no demos, because demos from unofficial games aren't a good thing... LeXeR was angry all the time and changed his config =). Thanx God, it didn't influence his great gaming in Korea. And we made a really good game...

December 2001, Korea - WCG Grand Final. There was only one goal - toplay a duel with ZeRo4 on q3tourney2, where I was sure in my victory. I was no match for him anyway, so he agreed with no questions. We started on a server with ztn3t1 - I proposed to change the map, but he didn't want to. So we started to play on ztn3tourney1. Almost all the players who came to the tourney, were watching, and it was nice for me. I could win the first match with 2 or 3 frags. He offered to play ztn again, and I understood that he was going to play in a very arcade style, I caught him on that all the time. As a result I won a lot. And the third match on q3tourney2 =). I don't remember the score, but it was real fun... After that I won several matches with Socrates, and defeated 3 times Stelam and the 2nd place winner from Canada - Ni3...

The conclusion, I think, is important for me only, as I have many games before me. I think I'll give to Cyberfight all the prizes (now i must to give only 50%), so I won't be too wired at champs =).  Or I'll invent something else... Will see.